(There are so many powerful issues raised by this tragic interchange of two people - the lesson I am seeking to absorb is not meant in any way to trivialize or gloss over any of the deep questions this situation raises. It is just one small thought that has impacted and helped me to change)

Darren Wilson,
simply had no idea that confronting two boys walking down the middle of a street would end up so profoundly changing his life
ending his job,
putting him on trial
nationwide even international attention

Michael Brown
had no idea that taking cigarillos from the corner store and encountering a lone man in a car would make any real impact on his day
let alone his life

who knew?

Proverbs 27:1New International Version

27 Do not boast about tomorrow,
for you do not know what a day may bring.

New International Version - UK (NIVUK)

if either of them could have known or seen the earth-shattering impact of choices made in relative obscurity and minutia would it have made any difference?

Take home lesson among many
so much of my life can seem mundane, trivial, obscure

I cannot even imagine having the intense scrutiny that this unfortunate and tragic interchange has brought upon these two individuals, their families, their communities, their town, this nation etc.

When I am home with my children...
Would I act differently if another adult was there to observe?
How would I act if several people were there?
or even my whole neighborhood?
or my whole town?

what if I was being filmed for the world over to scrutinize and replay over and over again and discuss?

Integrity is being exactly the same in all of these situations
because God is always watching
God always sees me

People have a wide variety of opinions, perspectives, responses
but
God always sees and God knows

not just what I do
but why

nothing can be hid or disguised from Him

Living for an audience of One

If I live with God in view
if I live knowing God has me in view

what would that change?

my attitude
the why of what I do
seeking to love Him who has loved me first
by showing practical love
to those He has put right here in front of me

seeing them as the opportunity God has given
to both know His love and grace working in me
and to extend it to them.

Believing that only through Jesus
am I or any one else, brought into this wonderful relationship
with the Living and all powerful and all loving God

That I deserve nothing, worse than nothing

and therefore can show His love and grace to anyone

Inner Transformation working outwards
how this changes my demeanor and tone and how I interact with my children, my spouse, my neighbors
the employee I have to interact with to get the window in my house repaired

to see each one as You see them
loved, desired, understood, longing to bless and comfort and save

how do I see these people?
how do I treat them?

how do I see that sink of dirty dishes
that pile of laundry
that bathroom that needs cleaning

meaningless,
trivial
mundane
obscure
something to avoid
or rush through to get to more 'meaningful' activities elsewhere?

Luke 16:10New King James Version (NKJV)

10 He who is faithful in what is least is faithful also in much; and he who is unjust in what is least is unjust also in much.

New King James Version (NKJV)

Luke 16:10New International Version (NIV)

10 “Whoever can be trusted with very little can also be trusted with much, and whoever is dishonest with very little will also be dishonest with much.

New International Version (NIV)

This is reality

How do I think, act ,interact and respond when someone I care about
or at least want to think well of me
is watching?

How do I - when I think no one is watching?

what would I do differently if I knew ahead of time that the tiny details of my day were going to be broadcast and scrutinized and discussed by millions?

this is reality with God
to be the same with or without
to live before His gaze only

an audience of one

this will keep me
this will transform me
this will bring me to my knees
to seek Jesus for the kind of deep, transforming and pervasive change He has wanted to do all along

"Faithful in little; Faithful in much"

Oh Lord,
help me to know you are here with me
you have given me these tasks and no one else
you see all
you see my motives and my heart
you are never confused or unaware or unsure of what is going on with me
within me

Help me to be
to do,
to be in relationships
as you want
as you will enable

whether anyone one else sees or doesn't see
You do see me
You see what I do
You see what I want

I want You
this is life changing and powerful
for me
and for all with whom my life intersects

This is opportunity on a grand scale
let me not believe the lies
that what lies before me is inconsequential
trivial
meaningless
drudgery

it is opportunity
to find YOU
to know YOU
to be changed
to know more of YOU
to know more of YOU in me
in my home
in my family
in my day

help me not to be driven to seek what you have not given at this time from others
such as attention, affirmation, approval

help me to seek and find You
right here and right now
in this place and time where I am

knowing I am not alone
but You are with me

Hebrews 13:5-6New International Version (NIV)

5 Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have,because God has said,

“Never will I leave you;
never will I forsake you.”[a]

6 So we say with confidence,

“The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid.
What can mere mortals do to me?”[b]

Footnotes:

Hebrews 13:5 Deut. 31:6
Hebrews 13:6 Psalm 118:6,7

New International Version (NIV)

1 Corinthians 10:31New International Version (NIV)

31 So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God.

New International Version (NIV)

Colossians 3:23J.B. Phillips New Testament (PHILLIPS)

Whatever you do, put your whole heart and soul into it, as into work done for God, and not merely for men—knowing that your real reward, a heavenly one, will come from God, since you are actually employed by Christ,...

J.B. Phillips New Testament (PHILLIPS)

J. B. Phillips, "The New Testament in Modern English", 1962 edition by HarperCollins

Today I sat down to go through my mom's little yellow box of addresses and phone numbers.
It has been in my kitchen on the counter now for almost 3 years unexplored, one of the last tangible items left after her passing over 30 years ago.

So much else that she touched, loved, created, cared for and invested herself in has, like her body passed on. But this little box remains.

When the dust has settled thirty years past my own passing, what will remain?
What will be my own legacy?

As I open the box, the first item to present itself is a poem entitled 'Friendship'.
what follows is the plastic packet, now yellowed with age, that was in her wallet and contained her driver's license and a few precious photos.

after that are 3x5 cards neatly handwritten with each person's name and contact info.
Most cards have handwritten notes on significant dates: marriages, births etc.

Many of these names I recognize as the persons my mom invested her time and life into nurturing and maintaining healthy and vibrant relationships with.

Behind these I find about 30-40 small cards, each one again handwritten and announcing the birth or adoption of a child. She had received these in the mail and kept them all.

Some blank 3x5 cards and I have reached the end of the box.

This box is my mom's legacy. It contains a lifetime of people, and time spent together and lives intertwined and shared with one another.

To me, in the midst of raising children, maintaining a household and all the hectic details that this involves, so much clamoring for my attention, my time and energy, this little box is a reminder that so much of what I am frantically preoccupied and focused on today, will, with the passing of time, fade into oblivion.
What will remain?

When I remember my mom, I remember a lot of things, but mostly not so much things
the food she made for us
the home she made a place to feel safe, cared for and loved
the way she spent time listening to me and interacting with me
the friends that filled her days with joy and companionship
the crafts she liked to make

If her life was measured by many of the standards considered by so many as valuable such as beauty, longevity or
what the world defines as significant accomplishment
she did nothing significant

But she lived in love to those God placed in her sphere
She never had the opportunity to travel abroad
or 'do minisry' across the sea
not to diminish this, it is a wonderful opportunity and should be taken if any possiblity exist to do so
but she lived in love where she was
she made time for those near her
she invested her life
not in ambition or esteem or such
but in quiet care
a listening ear
a helping hand
a sincere inquiry
a homemade meal

This is her legacy
To have believed the love of God for her through Jesus Christ
and to seek to love those in front of her by his grace alone and giving him all the glory

Oh, Lord
may I not be distracted from what is eternal and lasting by what is temporary and clamoring
Help me to find all my burning need met in you
right here
in this place
with these people
to be filled with your love and to love them as you have loved me
This is a lasting legacy

Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I have become sounding brass or a clanging cymbal.

2 And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing.

3 And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned,[a] but have not love, it profits me nothing.

4 Love suffers long and is kind;

love does not envy;

love does not parade itself, is not puffed up;

5 does not behave rudely, does not seek its own,

is not provoked, thinks no evil;

6 does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth;

7 bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

8 Love never fails...

13 And now abide faith, hope, love, these three;

but the greatest of these is love.

Footnotes:

1 Corinthians 13:3 NU-Text reads so I may boast. I Corinthians 13:1-8a, 13 NKJV

Christ's Love To You

Sunday, November 30, 2014

Integrity

Proverbs 27:1New International Version

Luke 16:10New King James Version (NKJV)

Luke 16:10New International Version (NIV)

Hebrews 13:5-6New International Version (NIV)

Footnotes:

1 Corinthians 10:31New International Version (NIV)

Colossians 3:23J.B. Phillips New Testament (PHILLIPS)

Monday, November 10, 2014

Legacy

Footnotes: