The Marriage Prayer

The Marriage Prayer

Dear Lord, 

please help me learn how to love with your love right now,

 right here in this marriage, in our difficult spots 

Help us to speak to the heart of each other
 instead of circling the periphery again and again. 

We love each other

We are committed to each other

We love our kids

We both want to make this work

We both want to trust God more

be filled with the Holy Spirit more

to be more Christlike

to be responsible

to be respectful

We both want to be cared for

loved

respected

close

a team

a unit with positive functioning dynamic

Help us Lord to connect with you and with one another
in the midst of the difficulties and conflicts of daily life:
 the pressures within and without,

the fears, the hurts, the misunderstandings,

and our beloved children
with all their own needs,
whom we love so much

There are so many wrong ways to go, 

help us to go your way

step by step 

moment by moment

response by response

Change is difficult

change takes time

especially when it is deep 

Give us patience and persistence

"Do not be weary in well doing,

for in due time we shall reap, 

if we faint not" Galatians 6:9

"Love suffers long and is kind"
I Corinthians 13:4a

 ^... speaking the truth in love, we will grow to become in every respect the mature body of him who is the head,that is, Christ. From him the whole body, joined and held together by every supporting ligament, grows and builds itself up in love, as each part does its work. Ephesians 4:15

Oh lord, give us courage to say the true thing, the hard thing, the needed thing

not to smooth over what should not be smoothed over
but needs to be faced straight on, face forward and head on 

 no patronizing love

but to speak with care and concern 

with a mind to the other's benefit and well being

what is needful

what is helpful

constructive, practical, hopeful 

forward moving 

a path ahead

"Love bears all things,
 hopes all things,
 endures all things,

Love never fails"
1 Corinthians 13:8

You love simply because it is your nature to love

not because of any deserving in the objects or recipients

Ultimately, it is about you and not about them

You want to love me more fully in this difficult place 

and you want to love my spouse through me

Let not my spiritual arteries be clogged with bitterness, resentment, impossible expectations

you alone can meet all my needs

you alone can fill me

you alone can enable forgiveness

you alone can bring peace

you alone can give wisdom

no matter what happens

I will know and experience more of you 

as I respond in faith, trust, love, obedience

I cannot make myself do any of these things

but I ask you to fill me with your Holy Spirt 

and bring me closer to you

But Jesus beheld them and said to them,
 "With men these things are impossible,
 but with God all things are possible." 
Matthew 19:26

Is anything too hard for the Lord? 
Genesis 18:14

I am the LORD God of all the peoples of the world, is anything too hard for me?
Jeremiah 32:27 New Living Translation

I believe

I surrender all my demands, rights, fist thumpings

I believe

I love 

to make the impossible, possible

"For he himself is our peace, who has made the two groups one and has destroyed the barrier, the dividing wall of hostility." Ephesians 2:14

There is no magic prayer, statement, conversation, book, seminar, retreat
 that can make this all neat, tidy and simple

but by your grace we will move forward 

step by step

moment by moment

response by response

and your glory can shine here